Maybe I’ve been here too long, but I’m not sure why the fact that Wayne’s sister, Chrissie Swan, was photographed smoking while pregnant is such big news here.

In fact, I first became immune to the shock of witnessing pregnant bogans smoking whilst visiting on a holiday here 6 years ago .

 

If you’re reading this from outside Australia or you live in Australia but haven’t chucked a sickie and stayed at home watching daytime TV in the last half a decade, you wouldn’t even know who Chrissie is.

 

She’s got her own Wiki page, but then again everyone does nowadays, even George Kaplan. No, all you need to know is that she’s a fat bogan on Australia’s celebrity “C list” (so somewhere off the alphanumeric scale when globally-calibrated). Everything else makes perfect sense when that fact is borne in mind.

For UK readers, think Jade Goody without the negative oncology report, although she’s clearly making good progress working towards that.